


Body & Mind

by meanderingsoul



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Episode Tag, Exhaustion, Gen, Introspection, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Past Relationship(s), Reminiscing, Season/Series 02, Talking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-25
Updated: 2020-07-25
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:47:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24940315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meanderingsoul/pseuds/meanderingsoul
Summary: “You aren’t used to seeing them as threatening people,” Andrew said. It seemed to startle Skye, more than a little.
Relationships: Andrew Garner & Skye | Daisy Johnson, Phil Coulson & Andrew Garner & Melinda May, Phil Coulson & Melinda May & Skye | Daisy Johnson
Comments: 20
Kudos: 46





	Body & Mind

**Author's Note:**

> This is a scene for Andrew and Skye getting to know each other a little more in the wake of 2x13 One of Us.

Once the room was empty Andrew lingered by the door. Skye hadn’t moved on the bed, was staring at the floor and not looking at her arms. He didn’t get the feeling she was actually ready to go back to sleep.

“Are you up for talking to me a little bit?”

She just shrugged. He waited. She’d either respond to that opening or she wouldn’t. Rushing things wouldn’t help anybody.

“Sure,” she finally said. “It’s... nice of you to ask.”

Andrew closed the door slowly. “Sleep and privacy are also important things. If you start feeling tired please tell me.”

She snorted. Hard to hold it against her. A good night’s sleep probably wouldn’t come easy.

He pulled the chair until she could see his feet when she stared at the floor, but could still easily avoid looking at him. For some people that was a necessity to talk like this. “I wanted to ask you about how you slowed your heart rate before, how you were affecting your own body that way.”

“I told you. May taught me.”

“You’re right, you did tell me that. I meant more along the lines of what you were thinking about while you did it. What’s the process?”

She was taking more time to answer him seriously than she would have even yesterday. Maybe his first impression with her had gone better than he’d thought. Sharing some small details about Melinda wouldn’t have gotten him this far on its own.

“For me... it’s really about remembering why I’m wherever I am and refocusing on whatever I need to do. So if I’m breathing wrong and it’s going to mess up the shot or my heart is racing and it’s going to make me tired, I can narrow things in on the task at hand, on what my body needs to be doing so I can get whatever it is done. Anything else can wait.”

“Compartmentalization,” he said. He was not surprised. At all.

“I guess, if you need a fancy word for it. May usually talks about mining or harvesting something. I finally asked her if she’d ever even been in a mine and she just said _yes_.”

Andrew snorted quietly, not the most professional reaction but it hardly mattered right now. “It works, to a certain extent. There’s a time and a place. Sometimes it’s not safe to have the reactions to the feelings you’re having where you are.”

Skye made a face. “You got _that_ right.”

Andrew filed the way she said that away to ask about later, and then tried to remind himself he was not getting invested back into all this mess again. He could keep telling himself that at least, put in a token effort with himself. “But that tactic only works for so long. People have limits on what they can handle. No one can compartmentalize forever.”

“Of course not. You’ve got to let it back out when you need it.”

“Need it for what?” he asked.

She paused to think again. Skye was obviously very aware of how she spoke, when she was deflecting and when she wanted to be understood.

“May usually says for energy. When you’re getting tired or worried or something and it’s slowing you down, dump out a bag.”

“A bag.”

“Well I’ve never been in a mine or at an actual harvest or anything, so mine are just. Garbage bags.”

“Ok. So you’re getting tired, losing focus you’re supposed to dump out a bag. But those are for feelings of frustration or anger, maybe even some anxiety or fear. Those can have a lot of energy with them sometimes. But what about sadness or other negative feelings? Regrets? How do those get back out of the bag?”

He got a long blank look before Skye turned her head away.

Andrew needed to change topic a bit. Hopefully she’d give it some thought. There was a reason Skye turned her powers in on herself when she tried to control them, hurt herself rather than letting what she was dealing with hurt others.

Melinda was going to put it together at some point, if she hadn’t already.

“Back in Wisconsin, were you thinking about something specific when you were directing the shakes away from your surroundings? Maybe a particular image in your head, or maybe a feeling you wanted to put away?” It hadn’t started or stopped without something on Skye’s end. He didn’t believe that for a minute.

“Not really.”

“Was it something more physical maybe? You mentioned controlling your breathing just now and I’ve watched you slow down your own heartrate.”

“I guess it was more like that than just... thinking about it.”

“It was more like being mindful of your body than your head?” he asked. Despite everything, Andrew still knew that was the kind of information Shield would want.

“Yeah.”

“Ok. Do you remember what made everything start to shake at the field? Were you trying to do it on purpose – stop the fighting?” He didn’t think that was it, but it gave her an opening to disagree.

“No.”

“Did it feel more like it started without your input?” Andrew didn’t think that was it either, it didn’t fit the pattern of fear so far, but if her powers were acting without a noticeable trigger...that would be really bad.

“No. It was, I was...afraid.”

That was progress, to get negative emotions identified without really pushing her. “Ok. It was a rough situation. Were you afraid of losing control around Cal or...”

The way she was hunching into the bed, staring fixedly at the floor in stead of around the room, that was shame. Oh. “You were afraid of Coulson and May.”

Now Skye looked ashamed and tired and suddenly painfully young. “Actually, I’m tired. Can we...”

“You aren’t use to seeing them as threatening people,” Andrew said. It seemed to startle her, more than a little.

“I’ve seen them in fights before. And May’s been training me now for _a year_ ,” she said, as if she’d been accused of missing something obvious.

“This was a different scenario though. Wasn’t it,” he said and waited. Andrew already knew why it was different. _They might hurt me_ wasn’t a thought she’d had to have before (as far as he knew) and it definitely wasn’t a thought she was ready to deal with right now.

Skye shrugged after a minute or so. “I guess,” she said faintly.

But when she looked over at him there was a change of tone visible on her face. “You weren’t bothered. At all. Even when May handed you a gun.”

For an emotional situation, that was _very_ observant. And the way she’d said it... just like Phillip. A question without actually asking one.

Andrew sighed. “That was not the first time I’ve seen them both in that kind of fight Skye.” For better or worse, it was far from it.

Melinda had been the one to teach him how to shoot in the first place, the same way she’d taught him how to really swim, how to stay of cameras without looking like you were trying too hard. She hadn’t had to teach him anything about how to read when the room was going to kick off, how to throw and block a punch. He’d known that part of things just fine already. Though the first time she’d thrown him to the ground had been something of a... revelation.

With the door closed there weren’t any little sounds from the base around them to offer distraction. He’d noticed Skye liked to fidget before, either genuine nervous habit or just restless hands, but with the compression braces on she kept moving her hands and then stopping. 

He needed to wind this down, let her rest. It had already been a long night. Skye had reacted well to bluntness so far, either because people had underestimated her intelligence so often in the system, or because she was just so much like Melinda.

“Do you remember the first public incident with the Hulk? At Culver University in West Virginia,” he asked.

“Kinda. Cell phone cameras weren’t nearly as good back then.”

 _Back then_. “Well, that’s where I teach.”

That piqued her curiosity again and she looked him in the face. “Were you _on campus_?”

“Yes. But I wasn’t near the Incident itself, different building.”

He mostly remembered the noise. How everyone’s phones went off at once before the campus sirens kicked in, that moment he’d thought the distant crunch had been a car crash. He remembered people yelling for others to get away from the windows, remembers helping hustle a few students into an interior closet like this was just some bad weather.

“Oh.”

Andrew managed not to smile at the disappointment. “Coulson and May were part of the Shield response unit that showed up before the dust even really settled.”

He said showed up cause it had never been clear who was actually assigned and who invited themselves. May had been allowed to go directly to him first. The campus was a mess, the military wanted Shield gone immediately because before New York there were still plenty who didn’t take them at all seriously. He’d driven to wait with Tom and it was the right move because it was three hours before they could get Benson out of the sciences building even though they knew he wasn’t hurt.

“So, you’re just... used to them. Like that,” she said.

“I’ve known them both a long time Skye.” Things could change in almost five years, but not that much.

“Better than me. Got it,” she said with a solid try at a joking expression.

But the sudden, bitter insecurity was obvious. Andrew wasn’t sure if the fact that Skye was just as unprofessionally attached to Melinda and Phil as they were to her made this situation better or worse.

“No, just longer. And you already know more about them than you might realize.”

Andrew bit the inside of his mouth when the suspicious and annoyed sideways glance he got could have been right off Melinda’s face. Skye quickly went back to looking at the edge of the bed.

“Hey,” he said, leaning forward until she looked him in the eye. “I need to make sure you understand you do not have to be afraid of Coulson and May alright? There is nothing you could ever do that would make them want to hurt you.”

“Ok,” she nodded a little. “That’s... ok.”

Skye did seem a little calmer at least. That was good, a good place to leave off with. “Think you can get some sleep?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m going to crash. Good night,” she finished absently, probably out of habit.

“Good night Skye. I’ll hit the light on my way out, ok?”

“Sure.”

Glancing back into the room with the light from the door, he could see she hadn’t moved, still sitting still with her arms in her lap. She wasn’t going to sleep yet.

Andrew hadn’t said there was nothing Skye could do to make them hurt her. He knew better. He wondered if Skye missed it, that little caveat in the wording.

He had a feeling she hadn’t.


End file.
